Music Therapy Thursday

As I was picking Anna up from school this afternoon, I heard this song on the radio. The sun was shining in the clear blue sky. The weather was perfect for Autumn. I passed the Fire Department where the American flag was whipping in the breeze. It made me thankful that I live in the southeast United States. I haven't always wanted to live here, but I'm loving my little "small town." Enjoy today's version of "Music Therapy Thursday," wherever you are!

Dear Ol' Dad... He Ain't What He Used To Be

Every time I attempt to get on my soapbox about something, I think to myself, "Surely I'm not the ONLY person that feels like this." Most of the time I'm not, but something has caught my attention as of late and it's rampant, the "norm," if you will. And I don't like it.

If you know me, you know I'm a HUGE fan of the children's channels. I can guarantee that NOBODY was a bigger fan of "High School Musical" ( 1, 2, OR 3) than moi. "ICarly" is one of my favorite shows (true) and I think "Phineas and Ferb" is pure genius. Compared to what is on "regular t.v." as I call it (That's anything on the major networks and NOT The Disney Channel or Nickelodeon), most of the kid shows are pretty tame. I have had issues in the past with the sassiness of the characters and some of the cheeky language that they use, but last night I was overwhelmed by show after show with parents who are portrayed as mindless goofballs and the children who have NO RESPECT for them.

Sure, we could peck over every petty little thing on T.V. if we wanted to and then we'd have NOTHING to watch. But I think this is very disturbing and I'll tell you why. Where are kids taking their cues from? T.V. Who are kid's trying to emulate? T.V. stars. Who do they want to dress like, look like, act like? It's not you and me. We are LAME compared to Miley, Selena, Miranda, and the rest of the teen and pre-teen idols. EVERY parent figure on these shows are boobs. They are goofy, uncool, and lack intelligence. ESPECIALLY the men. What is this saying to our kids? Sure, we all thought our parents were big ol' nerds, too, back in the day. I get that. But the father figures I remember were from "Leave it to Beaver," "Growing Pains," "Family Ties," and "Diff'rent Strokes." They may have not been the coolest dads in their kids' eyes, but they were treated with respect. Last night on "Good Luck Charlie," the little boy's character said "I wonder what kids with SMART dads do for fun?" after he had tried to pull one over on his father. REALLY?!?! Could you have seen Arnold Jackson saying that about Mr. Drummond? For those of you under the age of 30, um... that's a heck to the NO!

In the end, the dad from "Good Luck Charlie" actually pulled one over on the youngest son which I'm sure was a win for proud moms and dads everywhere. The young boy realized his dad wasn't such a goofball after all and all was well in the world of kid shows. Hopefully that little tidbit will also sink in to the minds of our impressionable youth as much as all the other innuendos they are bombarded with. We can only hope. I plan to talk to Jamie about this more in detail later and perhaps turn the T.V. off and nurture her love for books more than I have in the past. 'Cuz my reaction to having to give up my kids shows would be a pouty "What chu talkin' 'bout, Willis?!" And nobody wants to see me go THERE! LOL! ;)

Music Therapy Thursdays

I got such a huge response when I posted a little "music therapy" a while back on Facebook, that I thought I'd continue the party over here on my blog. I'm the type of person that RELATES to music. I mean I REALLY RELATE. :) Every momentous occasion in my life has a soundtrack. Almost every memory has a song attached to it. Weird, I know.

So it's probably no surprise that while I choose to celebrate with a song, I also cope with loss and sadness by tuning on the tunes. Sometimes, mere words fall short of the emotions that we're feeling. But combine those words with a melody, and magic happens. While listening to a little "music therapy" I've laughed, I've cried, and I've boogied so hard I got a side cramp. :D But in the end, "music therapy" left me feeling lighter, better... dare I say happier. And for a lot less than a visit to your neighborhood shrink.

And so "Music Therapy Thursdays" has been born. I hope you enjoy today's version. I thought it was a fitting choice to kick off our little party... And if nothing else, Dobie's shirt will surely make you smile!

Today's Top Ten

The Top Ten Ways You Know That Fall Is On It's Way To Alabama

10. What's that?? Nuthin' but silence, baby. The kids have been in school for about three weeks. Nice...

9. You have went through your closet (and the kids' AND your husband's) to strategically remove all tank tops and anything abnoxiously tropical. (Side note: my husband does not wear tank tops or tropical prints. Your welcome, Chuck. )

8. The AC in your car has been moved from the MAX setting to the regular AC setting.

7. The pool and been drained. ((sniff))

8. You realize after a few minutes outside in the evenings that you don't need your arsenal of insect repellents, the vat of "Skin-So-Soft" you stocked up on, or the bee suit you bougt off E-Bay. So long suckas!! (Pun DEFINITELY intended!)

7. Somebody said SOMETHING about a football game on Saturday... :D

6. Mums are showing up everywhere from front porches to Homecoming corsages. Ahh, memories...

5. Neighbors are getting re-aquainted as heat advisories for the elderly and the very young have been lifted.

4. Your children come into the living room dressed for bed in last years flannel p.j.'s. True story.

3. You wonder how long you can make your pedicure last before it's "closed toe shoe season." I mean, why spend the money when they're just going to be covered up so no one can see them, right??!!

2. You start thinking that chili for supper is not such a bad idea...

1. Wal-Mart has started putting out their Christmas decorations. Fo real.

I Can Dream, Can't I?!

It has occurred to me more than once when I view my blog that the cute little sillhouettes to the right are a little misleading. Well, only one, really. MINE.

I think that everyone else's is dead-on. I couldn't have done better if I had blackened out an actual pic of the kids and Chuck... but mine... well, it looks nothing like me. Kinda makes me feel bad, too, like I'm contributing to some kind of "false advertising" or something. It could definitely pass for the "me" circa 1993, but not the "me" of today, for sure.

I'm not completely to blame, of course. WWW. WIDDLYTINKS.COM did not have a slightly overweight female figure with super short hair, so I was reduced to choosing a sillhouette that represented me in a former life. Before kids. Twenty five pounds ago. When I had the time and energy to have a hairstyle other than the one I stole from Sinead O'Conner.

Maybe I should shoot those guys over at WiddlyTinks an e-mail and tell them that a body type of Queen Latifah and the hairstyle of Jamie Lee Curtis would be a more accurate representation of me these days. Maybe they would even be inclined to make that particular sillhouette for me. You know... just for kicks. I guess for now I'll keep it the way it is. And I'll keep to my South Beach Diet. And maybe sometime in the not so distant future, it may come to resemble me once again. I can dream, can't I?! ;)

A Little Pick-Me-Up

Today I was reminded of something a dear older lady once said to me. Allow me to set the scene:

I was working as a waitress in a nice restaurant that was owned by a good friend of mine. Her mother was a frequent patron and you could just tell she had been the quintessential "50's lady" back in the day. I think she came from money, but that wasn't what made her classy... she just was. Anyway, at this particular time I was dealing with a bout of depression (as I have from time to time over the course of my life) and apparently it SHOWED. After we had closed for the day, Ms. Betty approached me to see why I wasn't my usual self and though I can't remember our conversation verbatim, I think she got the gist of what what going on. I will never forget what she said next though: "Well dear, why don't you just go and put you a little lipstick on?!" Seriously, Ms. Betty? LIPSTICK?!!

Sure, because God knows a little Maybelline is just what the doctor ordered. Go ahead and give Ms. Betty a Nobel Prize, y'all.... she's just discovered a cure for depression! I wasn't sure there was enough lipstick in the world to make me feel better. Hmphh. LIPSTICK. Don't get me wrong, I was kind and respectful. She had no idea how absurd I thought her comment was. I've thought about that conversation many times over the years and I almost always laugh out loud when I do.

Years later, I started selling Mary Kay and one of the things I learned was that even in a terrible economy... even during the Depression... women will (and DID) spend money on cosmetics. Lipsticks and the like are a small investment that yield a tremendous result: looking better on some level makes us feel better. Perhaps Ms. Betty knew this all along.

I'm not trivializing depression. Depression is a disease that my family and I are all to familiar with and I know without a shadow of doubt that make-up cures NOTHING, except for maybe ugliness, but you know what I mean. Last night, however, I was reminded of Ms. Betty and her little antidote when Jamie Ruth wanted me to paint her fingernails. I usually don't keep my fingernails painted because I'm too hard on my hands: cleaning without gloves, crafting something, painting, etc. I admire other people who keep their nails well manicured, but it never seems practical enough for me to do it. But last night JR just insisted that we paint our nails the same color and have a "gowns only, red fingernails" club (seriously... I couldn't make this stuff up). So I relented thinking first thing this morning I would get the fingernail polish remover out and get back to my bare nails ASAP. Only I haven't....

It sounds crazy, but every time I look down and my flaming red nails, it makes me smile a little. I like the way they look even though I know they probably won't last through the day without getting a chip or a ding. But who cares, right? I feel a little fancy having my nails painted, and though it may seem impractical for my lifestyle, so what?! Nothing last forever, not even the impromptu manicure with your six year old. What's the worst that could happen? Having to repaint them at the second meeting of the "gowns only, red fingernails" club?

I like my nails so much that I'm thinking about getting my toes done. And after that, who knows? I might just take a cue from Ms. Betty and get the lipstick out. I'm not insinuating these little steps to better personal grooming are going to cure all that ails us emotionally, but if you're like me, it just might perk you up and bring a little smile to your day. And who could argue with that?

Anyhoo, I feel I must apologize to Ms. Betty. I know in her own way, she was trying to be helpful and if I hadn't been so obstinate, I might have seen that. I might have also realized earlier that sometimes little things can make a big difference in how we feel about ourselves. She's in heaven now. But I'm sure she's looking down on me and smiling... and you can bet she's wearing her lipstick.

"How are you?"

How do you answer a question like that? I think most people ask this question just to be polite. For whatever reason, society has coined the phrase to represent a greeting instead of an actual question for the concern of another. It's silly, if you think about it. Most times you could care LESS how the person you are talking to actually is. Heaven forbid they try to even TELL you about it. But what's even sillier is how we knowingly answer the question we know no one wants the answer to: "Fine!" And then perhaps we'll continue with our little exchange with a half-hearted, "And you?"

I believe we have lost a considerable amount of our social graces and I think that's a shame. Perhaps it's one of those things that we no longer have time for in this fast paced world we live in. I remember a time when neighbors visited with each other, and it was not the least bit inconvenient. It was welcomed. People would just "drop in" or "drop by" and I bet when they were asked, "How are you?" the someone doing the asking really wanted to know.

Nobody wants a Gloomy Gus around, that's a given. And we ALL have troubles, right? That's the main reason I fake it (like you do too) and quickly quip "fine" or "great." Sometimes I steal a favorite line from my step-dad and reply that "I'm hanging in like an old rusty fish hook." I suppose that answer is a little more acurate, though laden with humor to help muddle through the awkward exchange of pleasantries without commiting to an all-out conversation.

The bible tells us , however, that we should bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2) thus fulfilling the law of Christ. As the body of Christ we are not supposed to operate individually. We need each other for guidance, counsel, encouragement, and at times reproof. Do you have that friend or family member to "bounce off" of? When is the last time you were that person for THEM? When is the last time you really listened to what your husband or your children were saying? Are you keeping yourself to the confines of your home, and ultimately your mind, not reaching out to ask for the help that you need?

An aquaintance asked me yesterday how I was. I was going to brush her question off with my usual answer until she said I looked like I needed to talk and perhaps "unload" a bit. She told me to call her anytime, then told me she loved me. This wasn't my best friend, or my mom... it was someone who I don't even consider a close friend. But she took the time to see something I didn't even know I was projecting and really wanted to know about it. And that floored me. Just another example that God will use whatever and whomever necessary to reach us. He sees us in our pain and suffering and brings people in our midst to help us carry the load. Not everyone that asks you how you are is going to want to do that. But the next time you ask someone how THEY are, maybe you will think of this and be a burden bearer for them. I know I will.